I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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