So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
