you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize