It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
