Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
