I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
