We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize