Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
