You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
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