I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
pray to the hookup gods
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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