that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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