trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
