try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
this just has baby written all over it
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
