Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
A+ Viking dick
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