im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
