i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
So here I am, sexting at work.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
