I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
