No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
we're so committed to being not committed
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
