Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize