Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Randomize
