Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
