Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
