you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize