She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
