Who wears a wallet chain?!
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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