In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i think i have herpe
just one?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
