Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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