Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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