dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize