I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
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