He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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