whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
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