have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
