I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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