So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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