If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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