They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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