Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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