he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
