I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize