using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
