Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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