i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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