We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
