If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize
