He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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