There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
