What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
