Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize
