Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
